Overseas Update 1- "Arrival"

Many have reached out to see how I'm doing and how things are going. I am very appreciative for all who have. I've received many texts from you all saying that you are praying for and thinking of me. These never fail to come through at the most perfect times. God is using even the little things like that in huge ways to encourage me in this season. These two questions: one, “How are you doing?” and two, “How are things going?” seem to come up most so these I will seek to answer in this update. First, please forgive me for the vagueness that will come with my responses to both of these questions. They both require such for different reasons. Relationally with the first and for safety reasons for the second. Also, please forgive me for my lack of updates so far. I planned to give an update after the first week then monthly after that but I had a lot of things on my mind thus far and wasn't able to add that to my plate until now. Many of you reading this however are donors and/or prayer warriors on my behalf, so I am glad to be able to brief you now. Thank you for being such a vital part of what God is doing in and through my life.

* Note: I am not mentioning the name of the country I am in, intentionally. If you don't know where I am, reach out to me and I will let you know privately. It is illegal to share the gospel where I am, therefore communication with the outside world about what's going on is limited. It must not be on social media in any way. Keep this in mind as you read. I personally am not in danger, the worst that could happen to me, at least legally, is to get deported. The ministry and for the missionaries I work with however, this is not the case. They could be arrested and disappear if info got out, because of this I must be careful.

1. How are you doing?

This is a complex thing to answer right now haha. Honestly, I came here heartbroken over a relationship situation from the states and culture shock was quite vicious on top of that, especially the first several nights. Being in a big new city, all the new dangers, new people, new noises (so many noises it puts American cities to shame), new smells, new foods, etc was an overwhelming change. Not to mention, hardly anyone spoke English so the simplest of tasks became a terrible headache. I felt helpless and like a burden. I was terribly sad, quite lonely, emotionally and physically exhausted, and very overwhelmed by it all. All these things and the relentlessness of heartbreak made it hard to sleep at night even with the severe exhaustion and jet lag at play. However, Father would remind me of these two truths each night: one, He was there, and two, He cared about me. I would recite these to myself and beg Him to give me the ability to believe them, eventually I would, and then I would experience the comfort of being His son and trusting Him to be a good Father. In this, I came to know Father on a deeper level. Also, the card and gift the FMBC prayer team sent me was very comforting in this time.

Before long however, I began to walk with new swagger. I learned within a week how to navigate life here and from there, things got easier. I'm still learning everyday, but at least I had the essentials down. With that change most of the culture shock wore off as well. The following weeks consisted of a lot of travel for my coaching/ministry with four or more hours on a bus each day. This time afforded me the opportunity to discuss with Father the things still very heavy on my heart. This gave me great comfort as well. My relationship with Him has deepened a lot through this time. In all the pain of heartbreak, loneliness, and missing home He has been faithful to reveal a lot of Truths to me and allow me to see His heart more clearly. While It has not been a cakewalk since this first hard week, it has gotten easier as I learn to trust and rely on Him in new ways. Hard times have come since then and circumstances, no fault of anyone’s just the situation and how it played out, have taken my broken heart and broken it further yet in all of it, He has been so very faithful. God has used His people and truths from His word to comfort and encourage me onward in such beautiful ways. While I wouldn't wish the pain of my last 3 weeks on my worst enemy, I wouldn't trade it for the world. I'm thankful Father has entrusted me with such trials and strengthened me as a man. So, while I feel this maybe only answers 10% of what could really be said about this first question, I think this will suffice for now. If you want to know more about what I experienced and what Father taught me through it, invite me to dinner when I return home. A hungry college kid would be happy to have a nice meal and happy to share what Father revealed about His heart through the vigorous school of pain. A man I deeply respect once said, “Only when you walk with Jesus can pain become your tutor and friend.” and I have found this to be profoundly true in this season.

Here is a short poem I wrote in my journal while meditating on these things:

"I am a man who now walks with a limp.

I am proud of my limp.

It was a gift from my Father.

My Older Brother had one too.

I am weak because of my limp.

It robs me of self stability.

It instructs me that it’s not safe to walk alone.

And it reminds me to live by the life of Another.

I am thankful for my limp.

It allows me the opportunity to know truth.

And I know truth because I know God.

And I know God because I’ve known pain…

Hence the limp."

Also, I’m adding this afterwards as I wasn’t sure where to add it in, so ill put it here. I made a very sweet friend from Holland and she connected me to an international church that takes place in English. Last Friday it was a much needed hug and kiss on the head from my Heavenly Father. (church here takes place on Fridays not Sundays). I love my new church, it is a great blessing.

2. How are things going?

For the sake of brevity we will assume this question refers to ministry, as other things were also covered in the previous question. Ministry is challenging here, it's going well, but it's quite difficult, and my expectations for what it would be like had to change. Two main challenges unfold, first, obviously the language barrier is terribly difficult and frustrating. But second is the delicacy of Muslim ministry in an Islamic country where it is illegal. In this country people are very passionate Muslims, to them, Islam is not what they believe it’s who they are. Their passports and ID’s even list their religion. To consider another faith is not even a consideration in their minds, much less changing faiths. Not to mention the pressure placed by their families and the terrible consequences they would endure if they were to make the switch. For this reason, they are very closed off to the gospel, and their first reaction is not to listen, but rather to immediately reject. They can and will report you to the police at any time for sharing. This means lots of relationship and trust has to be built before effective ministry can take place. Ministry here is a marathon not a sprint. This is hard for the American mind to grasp, but it’s the best and only way within this cultural context.

Here’s what I’m doing: I absolutely love coaching! I coach at a soccer academy two days a week that is in a city a few hours away from my home. There I am coaching 6u, 8u, and 10u boy’s teams. I am also an assistant coach on a women's professional team. It's through the same academy, I travel all around neighboring cities coaching their matches. This is my “in” to minister. Since we can't openly do ministry here, we must have an “in”. Something that gives us the ability to build relationships and trust, until we get opportunity to share the gospel.

Each practice ends with a “character session”. This is a time where coaches share with players how to develop your character and other aspects of life outside of “football”. These are the opportunities where we get to share. We often share bible stories and biblical truths without saying ,“this is from the Bible” and change some names without compromising the story. This is done to get them thinking and processing without an initial offense. Think of it this way, this really helped me: “ Ministry here is like a puzzle. We cannot show them the front of the box or they will not respond well and our opportunity in their life will be ended.” One of our leaders told me. “ Instead we must trust the Holy Spirit to keep the picture on the box in our heads and guide us through putting one piece together each time we relate with them. Then we must trust the Holy Spirit to put enough of the pieces together within their minds and hearts that we have the opportunity to finish the puzzle.” He explained. So this is what we do, we coach, we love, we live out the gospel, and we plant pieces of the puzzle in their hearts. Then we pray fervently for their souls, that they would begin putting pieces together. Trusting us enough to show them the full picture, when the time is right. As backwards as that may sound to the western mind, it's what works best here. I trust my leaders as they follow where the Holy Spirit is leading them. Please continue to pray for myself, the leaders and the athletes I coach, along with their families too.

Soon, I will be a part of a team of men who are starting another Football academy in the city where I live. This one is for Sudanese refugees, not natives. In this case it should be a situation where the gospel can be shared a little more forwardly, as the Sudanese are a bit more open, and the government doesn’t care about them as much. They are also much less likely to report us to police. I have been teaching English on Wednesdays with a young woman I met here that is about my age from Holland to Sudanese individuals. It is not affiliated with any of my ministry, but I just met her and really enjoyed spending time with her. She speaks fluent English and has been here a few months. She is very helpful and incredibly kind, a breath of fresh air each week. When she invited me to join, I did and I’ve really been enjoying it. The Sudanese seem like fertile ground for ministry too. Please pray for this outreach we are beginning. 

If you've read to this point, I know you truly care and are invested in what God is doing. For that, I say thank you. You are truly a blessing from God Himself in my life, I could never fully express my gratitude.

Love, Gage